“Injury” in the Six-Pack for Super Bowl Saga

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The story┬ábegins with our hero, embarking with vigor on his course, full of gusto and invincibility. Then he must endure a powerful setback, you know, to heighten the drama.­čśë

I hadn’t really considered Troy’s Six-Pack for Super Bowl Challenge a story and therefore did not anticipate the requisite setbacks that must come with good drama. Until today…

I walked into the kitchen to see Troy hopping on one foot in extreme pain while┬ásimultaneously┬áholding his profusely bleeding finger over the kitchen drain. Of course, my first thought was concern. I may be a nagging spouse, but I’m not a monster. My second thought, I’m ashamed to say, was how impressed I was at his quick reflexes. All that blood would have been a job to clean (for the uninjured spouse).

I have “nagged” him on multiple occasions about the power of my Wusthof knives. They just sound dangerous. Each time, he, like a truly nagged husband, had looked at me with a look of “duh” on his face.

So as his finger dripped power-dripped blood into the sink, I felt an “I told you so moment” come on but, of course, refrained. Again, not a monster.

“What happened?” I said.

“This damned diet!” he yelled.

To which I said nothing because… ????

“Who in their right mind would eat raw cabbage of their own free will?!”

Again, silence on my part with a look like this ­čĄö (mental note: must stop thinking in emojis)

“Now look!” He held his finger up, hangrily. “This would have never happened.”

Again… ­čĄö But I’ve lived with Troy for over 15 years. I know when not to call him on faulty logic.

So, like the loving wife I am, I pulled out the bacitracin and 3 bandaids, which I used to gob the bleeding and encase the sliced finger tip.

“I just hope this doesn’t affect my workout,” he said, wiggling his finger and examining my first-aid prowess hack job.

Now, I know you’re likely worried about this preemptive injury in the saga of the Six Pack for Super Bowl but never fear, my Wusthof didn’t mortally wound┬áhim and the cabbage wasn’t as bad as he was SURE it was going to be. I think he’ll be ok. #prayforTroy

in-pain

Strangely enough, I didn’t think to document the actual drama so I searched the internet high and low for a decent reenactment of it.

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